Wednesday, October 19, 2005


Well the landlord is taking me to court next week to attempt to evict me from my apartment. In a way I knew this was coming- he is such a vindictive bastard. But then so am I- if he had just FIXED the problem when he said he would, I would have kept paying rent and probabley would not be buying a house right now. In fact I KNOW I wouldn't. The fact that he completley blew me off until he wanted money incensses me, and that man is NEVER getting another penny out of me

Monday, October 17, 2005

Moth to the Flame 

Last week I got a phone call from John (my ex John that is) wanting to check up on how I was doing. We got in a long discussion about families and the past and I had asked him if his family liked me. I mean Glenns family disliked me, and Jon's family outright hated me, so I wanted to know- was it something about ME. He told me his family loved me, and when I proved doubtful, he put his sister on, who I ended up chatting to for a good 30 mins. So knowing this family thing was not completly my fault, we ended up talking about what we've been up to in the last 8 years since we have seen each other, and about the people we were when we did know each other. All in all a ncie conversation, but he said something that made me stop and think about myself.
He said that I always had guys around me, that they were attracted to me like a Moth is to a bright light. I laughed at this, and said thanks for the flattery. But he was pretty insitant and it's made me think a lot about the people around me. Is it true what he said? That I just have THAT personallity that make guys want to do things for me, that the men I date move fast because they are afraid that if they don't they will loose me? He included himself in the analogy so I don't believe he was judging my current situation, but it makes me wonder.

Thursday, October 13, 2005


I was a bad bad BAD girl the other night. Most of you know of my book addiction. I have a membership to Barnes & Noble which gets me at least 10% off and often on new books up to 40%. So the other night I decided I needed a little "fluff" reading when I went out to dinner and as I didn't have the book I was reading with me I stopped at a small local bookstore- BN was too far to go to at that point. I put $10 in my pocket and told myself I was not allowed to spend any more than that (It's the only trick that works- leave the cc in the car and only take a small amount in with me). But the first thing I saw when I walked in was the new book by Diana Gabaldon- which upon inspection was above the $10 limit I had set myself. I knew I would by the book eventually from bn as it was one with the 40% discount so I went to put it down- And then I flicked open the front cover. It was signed. Crap. I knew BN would not have a signed copy. I love this author and these books, in fact it's one of the best series I have ever read and that's saying a lot. Anyway, I HAD to have it.

Hello. My name is Jennie and I am addicted to books.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005


I have never been so tired in my life. And it's not physicall tiredness, it's mental. I just want to run away from the whole world and be happy again. I was happy once I think.
Tonight is the inspection on my house. I should be excited. But I am not. Who do I have to share this with? There is no one holding my hand, no one smiling that big smile- this is my FIRST home. It's meant to be this great adventure. Instead everyone around me is pissed. My god WHY? Why is it that they must feel this way, and bring down what should be one of the most exciting times in my life?
The fleas are terrible. They are so thick, that I found them crawling all over the litter box last night. They didn't even care that I was scooping. Normally the hop off. Thank god the "kids" are on Advantage and are not getting bitten- I sure am though. The spiders too are out of control. I sweep the webs at night, and they are all back the next day. And I pay $500 for this crap- well I did until I refused to pay. And the landlord STILL hasn't responded. And the previous landlord still has not given us back our deposit money. So why in gods name would I ever want to rent again?
I have 2 exams on Monday. Rome and Monfasani. Neither of which I am looking forward too. I feel like time is slipping through my fingers.
You think you know someone all your life, and then they reveal a side of themselves that makes you realise just what they are capable of. Even Murder. It makes you wonder about yourself, you own failures, if things had been different- could you do that? I was once sure that the answer to that was no. The fact that someone I thought I knew showed his own capacity for such horrors, makes me wonder- could i??? surely not.
And things with J are not much better. Work has him on a crazy schedule, so I've barely talked to him in 2 weeks. I miss Maine more and more these days. The ease with which we lived. We went to work, we came home, we shopped, everything we. Now it's he and I and I miss the companionship. He's not happy about the house. The one person I thought would be excited for me, he seems almost like he could give a crap. *sigh* And I am not happy about the distance. But what can I do really? His job sends him on the road and I always said I'd stand by him. And I always have- but only when we are seeing a lot of each other. As soon as things start keeping him away- training, work, family- I start getting ansty. Am I THAT insecure? Do I need his attention 24/7? Or am I truely missing something from him. I just don't know any more.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Take Two 

Well they accepted my offer on the house. The closing thus far is set for the end of November, which is a little later than I wanted, but we'll see if we can move that up. Geez- this is like the last bastion of adulthood. I must be an adult because I bought a house. Holy crap.

Sunday, October 02, 2005


What else would I write about right?? Well I looked at 5 houses today. Well, almsot 5. The first house we hit was on Clayton Rd- a very nice quiet neighbourhood with a nice big lot. But the house was VERY small (863 sq ft), 3 bedrooms but all abount only 10x10 each. Plus the washer and dryer were in seperate rooms, so I put it on the maybe list. The 2nd house was on Albany St, this was the one we didn't actually see. We got there, to be greated by someone who said she was a tenant who had just moved in and had a year lease. The neighbours seemed really "rough" so as the owner didn't show up on time we decided to move on to the next house. The next was on Chrisler Ave. The neighbourhood was not as quiet or as nice as the Clayton Rd house, but it was definatly bigger. 4 Rooms upstairs and a huge living and dining room downstairs. But there was no stove or fridge, and the upstairs bathroom was very small and DEFINATLY needed updating. There was a lot of potentional and the price was great- only 65K. So I put it on the maybe list. The next house we looked at was 8th Ave. It was a cute house outside and a nice neighbourhood. The seller was very motivated to sell, and when we walked inside we knew why. A Tenant had TRASHED the place. There was 2 bedrooms and they were both Tiny, and the place was a nightmare. That was a big no. Finally we stopped at Carrie St. It's right by Union college and although the beginning of the street is not the best, it's a dead end street and the house is at a very nice end. It has a set of stairs with flowers on each side. The owners were home, a nice young couple with a 2 year old child. Anyway, the house was lovely. Wood floors throughout, a nice entryway, a large living room, 2 bedrooms, 1 about 12x12 and a bigger one, about 12x20. The kitchen was nice and big, although it is an eat in kitchen which cramps the space a little. The back yard is very nice, with a great little veggie garden. The Basement is semi-finished, with a bathroom, and a pellet heater which helps keeps the costs down. The taxes are not as high as many other areas either. Basically, Its perfect. I am sitting down with my real estate agent to make an offer tomorrow. The only thing I think I would have to change is that the "guest room" in pink. It's small, around 1000sq ft. But it's not cramped. So I am happy with it.


Pages of Note:
The Words of my bestest bud.
My Aunt's Blog

EDJ's Blog
The rabble of film reviews- cinemablend


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