Thursday, February 22, 2007
When J and I first broke up I went on about a dozen dates, all aimed at trying to rebound and move on. I stopped because all it was doing was making me think of him and wanting to be with him. It's been It's been 6 months now, and I finally feel like I am ready to move on, without thinking of him. On Valentines I was joking with one of the EMS guys and he ended up bringing me a flower. I was so taken aback that I gave him my number.
Well tonight he called and I am going for a drink with him and a bunch of EMS guys.
Wish me LUCK!
Oh- and just a side note for Gerard...... Those shoes are REALLY comfortable!! Thanks!!
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
It's been so long since I've written anything here. Life has just been so hectic that I can't ever find the time to just sit and write. I keep thinking of things I want to say... but they are long gone before I have the time to write anything.
Tonight I want to talk about something that has impacted me a great deal since I started my new job- death.
There is nothing in this world more feared than death to many people. The loss of a loved one, the fear of the unknown, to most of us it's just a spectre that doesn't touch our lives until we, or someone we know, dies. This is what i call Personal death. At work I am often an outsider to personal death- I call this impersonal death. The woman screaming her husbands name to come back to her, the group of firemen with teary red eyes, the mother who just sinks quiety into a chair. This death isn't people I know, and people who work in places like this get a tough skin about it. We talk about the cases over dinner or a glass of wine, interested in the cause of death, more than the impact to those left behind. We have to seperate ourselves or we could never do this job. And yet we are never completly immune. I still can't handle seeing a grown man cry, or seeing the patient who is alive, but obviously won't be for much longer. That still touches me.
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