Sunday, July 16, 2006
I hurt. So deep down inside that I don't know where it is coming from. Regret. I never should have done this. I never should have terminated. I should have listened to my heart instead of my brain. But i know, I could not have had this child and have a happy life for us. I would never be able to give it the life it deserved. But that heartbeat haunts my dreams. In a way I am relieved it is over. There is no more fear of the unkown, the path I had traced formelf is again wide open instead of barred with a child to care for. But that thought leads to guilt and shame. But I must rely on my inner strength, I must not look back on what I now cannot change.
But I will never forget that heartbeat.
But I will never forget that heartbeat.
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